ACT I, SCENE IV - "MAXIMUS GETS U-G-L-Y"

Wright Manor. Maximus' Wing. Re-enter Maximus and Tonya holding hands.

Maximus, "Wow, you looking hot tonight, baby girl!"
Tonya, Blushing, "Hot for you, Sir Maximus."
Maximus, "Girl, you need to stop yo stuff. Turn around one time for me."
Tonya slowly turns around. She wearing a one-piece, pink teddy Maximus bought for her.
Maximus, Rubbing his chin, "I must say, tha Lord has truly blessed you, Sister Tonya. Make a brotha wanna scream. In fact, I think I will scream." (He lets out a high pitch scream and then laughs.)
Tonya, Getting embarrassed, "St....st.....stop that, boy, before someone hears you!"
Maximus, "Awe, girl........ain't nobody gone hear us. Remember, you're in Sir Maximus' wing."
Tonya, "B....b....But what if Darling comes over?"
Maximus, "She won't.....she's preoccupied with her own life, if you know what I mean."
Tonya, Feeling more relaxed, "Oh, really? And who's she with?"
Maximus, "Don't worry 'bout all that. We got our own business to take care of."
He grabs her and starts kissing her.
Tonya, Looking around nervously, "Are you sure no one is going to come in?"
Maximus, Feeling rejected, "Will you please stop worrying."
Tonya, "But what about Pastor and First Lady Wright?"
Maximus, Sighing heavily, "They are both out of town and aren't expected until 5:00 a.m. Now come on girl, let's get busy. I need you."
Maximus starts kissing Tonya again.
Tonya, Responds but suddenly draws away, "And what is with you ignoring me at church? Are you sh...sh...ashamed of me?"
Maximus, Smiling, "Girl, you know we got's to be mo' careful."
Tonya, Allowing him to pull her closer, "I guess you're right. After all, I am First Lady's 'handmaiden' and closest confidant."
Maximus, Kissing her on her lips and neck, "Of course, I am.... I mean, of course I'm not. And what would my daddy say. You know how he feels about 'fornicators'!"
Maximus, Gestures and points as if preaching, "Thou shalt not fornicate!"
He and Tonya laughs.
Tonya, In a soft voice, "But Pastor Wright, you just don't understand......we, fornicators, have needs."
Maximus, Still 'preaching', "Needs?! Da Lawd shall supply all yo needs!"
Tonya, Grabbing Maximus' hand; placing it on her breast, "But Pastor, how da Lawd gone fulfill this need?"
Maximus, Kissing her passionately, "Yeah, now that's what I'm talking about. Enough talking. Let's git it on!"
Maximus starts humming 'Let's Get It On' by Marvin Gaye.
Tonya, Swooning and falling onto Maximus' bed, "Yeah, baby, that's my song."
Maximus, Softly lying on top of her, still humming; then singing, "Let's get it on.....let's get in on......"
Tonya, Softly, "Oh, yeah. I'm feeling you, baby."
They are interrupted by the phone ringing.
Pastor Wright, Sternly, "Maximus? Boy, what you up to?"
Maximus, Suddenly raising up and adjusting his clothes as if his father is there in person, "Sir? Nothing, sir. I was just sitting here laying down some beats."
Pastor Wright, Knowing his son is lying, "You sure? Why do you sound strange? You wouldn't be doing something you shouldn't be?"
Maximus, Lying, "No, sir....Well, sir.....I was singing and really getting into the song. And suddenly, I started to feel the Spirit."
Pastor Wright, Laughing, "You ain't got some pretty young girl over there have you, son?"
Maximus, "No, sir.....I don't have no pretty young girl over here."
Tonya punches him on the arm.
Maximus holds his finger to her mouth; gesturing her to keep quiet.
Pastor Wright, "Well, I just called to say, your mother and I will be there shortly. The conference ended early, and we decided to come on home to see what you and Darling were up to."
First Lady Wright insisting on speaking with her son.
First Lady, "Son, are you all right? Have you been eating?"
Maximus, Clearing his throat and smiling, "Yes, Mother. I'm fine, and yes, I've been eating."
First Lady, "Where's your sister? Where's Darling?"
Maximus, "She in her room. Do you want me to transfer you to her room?"
First Lady, "Yes, son. Hold on a second. Baby (To Pastor Wright), do you need to speak with Maximus any more?
Pastor Wright, Clearing his throat, "No, dear. Just remind him that we'll be there in about an hour."
First Lady, "Okay. Son, transfer me to Darling's room."
Maximus, Breathing a sigh of relief, "Yes, Mother. Love you. See you and Pops soon."
First Lady, "Love you, too."
Maximus, Calling Darling's room, "Darling? Girl, you got your clothes on? Mom and Pops are on their way home!"
Darling, Alarmed, "But I thought they weren't expected until 5:00 a.m.?"
Maximus, Laughing, "They weren't but the conference ended early, and they decided to surprise us. So you'd better get some clothes on and send that dude home."
Darling, Lying, "What dude?"
Maximus, Still laughing, "Yeah, right."
Maximus, Coming back to his mother, "Mom, she must be in the bathroom. But I know she's home. We'll see you when you get here."
First Lady, "Well, alright.......Love you...kisses."
Maximus, Kissing the phone, "Love you, too, Mom. See you in a little bit."
Maximus, Hanging up suddenly and grabbing Tonya, "Come on girl. We ain't got but a few minutes and that's all I need."
Tonya, Giggling and punching Maximus, "You ought to be ashamed. And what was that all about?"
Maximus, Laughing, "What?"
Tonya, "No, sir, I ain't got no pretty young girl over here. So I ain't pretty?"
Maximus, Still laughing and kissing Tonya, "Aw, girl, you know I was just playing. You know you are so beautiful. (He starts singing the song, "You Are So Beautiful.)